


I See You In the Dream I'd Dream Forever

by flamingosarepink, mm_nani



Series: windmills of your mind [4]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Delayed Angst?, Ficlet?, M/M, Set in the Ne Me Quitte Pas verse, but with fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2017-12-03
Packaged: 2019-02-10 00:03:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12899706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flamingosarepink/pseuds/flamingosarepink, https://archiveofourown.org/users/mm_nani/pseuds/mm_nani
Summary: If Auba is honest, he's never been happier to feel Marco breathe.





	I See You In the Dream I'd Dream Forever

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mm_nani](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mm_nani/gifts).



> This is my attempt at an even mix of fluff and angst. As the tags say, this is part of Nani's amazing verse and I'm very very happy that she let me write this! So here we are, and I hope that she loves it!

“I was thinking about you.” Marco mumbles, shifting so he can look at Auba properly despite the darkness their bedroom is cloaked in. A clock ticks softly on the wall, and the snow falls softly outside their home. Auba sleepily makes a humming noise, an affirming one. The winter break has left them with plenty of time to have for themselves, what with the sudden onset of the holidays that leaves Marco with a small smile on his face when they come home from the restaurant they often frequent together because Dortmund is decorated to the nines.

“You’re always thinking about me.” Auba’s voice has that deepness that comes along with being sleepy and tired after a long day. He presses a kiss to the top of Marco’s head, a short distance given that Marco is tucked against his chest- settling once more against the pillows. Marco heaves out a tired sigh, looking up at Auba just so. This isn’t a conversation he would normally have at this time of night, when the two of them should probably be asleep but the thought in particular has been nagging him for a while. It hasn’t left Marco’s mind at all despite attempts to let it drift away like a leaf in the wind and it doesn't seem to be leaving any time soon. 

Marco cuddles a little bit closer at the slight nip in the room, or maybe perhaps, it’s the subject of his thoughts that is chilling. It’s always a subject he prefers not to think about given how things were for the two of them then. Things are better now, their life is quieter to some degree and they’re both happy. Although given the length of time that Marco has debated on telling Auba about this, he supposes it’s best if he knows even if it might make the other man’s feelings of guilt just a little bit worse- the feelings of guilt that Auba pretends not to have and tries to hide even though Marco can see it from the way his lips purse when his fingers brush over the scar hidden under Marco’s slightly grey-tinged blond hair, which has happened more times than Marco can count as they cuddle on the couch on any given day after they come home from a morning at the training ground when they're both exhausted and not thinking much about really anything. 

He doesn't know how to really put this, until it just comes out simply into terms that Auba will be sure to understand. “During the accident, you were all I could think about. I was scared and all I wanted was you, even though I didn’t remember what had happened to our marriage. None of that would have mattered even if I had remembered. I just wanted you when I woke up.” After all, it's nothing but the truth and there's really no other way this could be said.

Marco waits for what happens next. He anticipates the tenseness that normally comes along with this type of subject although the fingers featherlightly rubbing at his back in that content way do not still. Auba lets out a soft breath, before he speaks in almost a whispery tone given their closeness to one another. “That’s why I came to visit you when Mario called me. Even though we hadn’t spoke in a while I couldn’t just pretend you didn’t need me. Besides, I missed you and that just made all of it even worse once I saw you.” Auba has tried to forget what it was like seeing Marco in the hospital, although the image is still burned into his mind as a constant reminder that he could have lost his chance to ever make up with the man he loves. It's never the kind of the thing that one can forget. He’s bad at hiding the guilt he’s harbored since then. Marco has tried to soothe it, although maybe in some way Auba won’t ever be able to forgive himself no matter how many times Marco tells him it wasn’t his fault via every loving glance or touch he’s given since then. It’s far more than he thinks he deserves, but Marco doesn’t seem to realize that. He just loves intensely- the kind of intense that he puts into everything he loves be it football or the life he has with Auba that only the two of them see.

There’s an obvious silver lining to all of this- everything is okay again between the two of them when it very well could easily not have been. They could have gone on the same path they were on when the accident happened. But they didn’t, they're happier, and that’s all that matters.

Auba is thankful everyday for it when he wakes up in the mornings and sees Marco laying next to him again. The other man is something precious, something to be appreciated, something to be loved. Not to mention, the kids at the Academy look up to him immensely, and Auba can’t help but relish in getting to see how much work Marco has put in to make them better. 

“I think about this a lot, as much as I don’t like to admit it, but if I’d lost you I don’t know what I’d have done.” Auba doesn’t know why he just suddenly vocalizes this thought he’s kept hidden away for ages and thinks about everyday. “I’m never going to let you forget how much you mean to me.” It’s only after Auba doesn’t get a response that he looks down to see Marco isn’t awake anymore.

Marco has pillowed his head on Auba’s chest.

If Auba is honest, he’s never been happier to feel Marco breathe.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is taken from Act One of Puccini's brilliant opera La bohème.


End file.
